Long Distance?

Question

Hi ladies! So my ex boyfriend and I broke up a little over 5 months ago because I moved across the country for professional school. I wanted to try long distance, but he wasn't able to commit that way (we'd been together 8 months and he has some baggage from a pervious relationship). We tried being friends but that didn't work too well for me as it was just too hard to pretend I wasn't falling apart. The not talking didn't work and dating other people didn't work either.

We decided to talk about trying long distance. We both have just over 3 years left our degrees left and switching universities isn't an option. We're meeting up in a little over a week over our university reading week to talk about things. Does anyone have any advice for making long distance work? The idea is for us to come up with a sort of plan and try to see if we can make it work. Has anyone had any success with long distance? I'll just mention that we're in our early 20s and neither of us have a lot of money for travelling back and forth (plus with school it's just not possible). Your advice is really appreciated!

Answer

Communication is key! Because a lot of misunderstanding could happen through text messaging or just in general. And of course being honest with one another.

Answer

I met my fiancé when I was 12. So, almost 9 years ago. We were off and on the whole time, dated other people, got together again, the time wasn't right again, dated other people again.... And now I'm laying in bed with him curled up asleep next to me. You had a lot better foundation than we had. We didn't meet in person until I was 16. It's all about communication. Lots and lots of communication, and I don't mean just talking all the time. Deep conversation will keep the connection going. It's also better to take LDR one day at a time instead of trying to live in the future of y'all being close together again. I would suggest if you can occasional visits. If you're sexually active, you're going to probably be compelled to spend that time in bed together. That's fine, but I do not recommend making it the main focus of your visits together. It can mess with you psychologically in the end. In the end, it's communication, trust, and patience.

Answer

I've been in a LDR for a year when I was in love with a dumb Marine (worst mistake ever). I'm currently in a long distance relationship since October of 2016 though. Initially, it was SO hard for me. I fell into a depression 2 weeks before he even left. I was angry. I'm in New York and he moved to Wyoming because of a job offer and the fact that the last of his family resides there. (Family tragedies gave him more desire to move). Going from being with each other all the time to not at all didn't settle well with me, but he was persistent on making it work. After a lot of convincing, this city gal/beach bum is gonna turn Wyoming cow girl next year after graduation. LDR's all come with trust, compromise, and EQUAL EFFORT. It just won't work if one is putting in more than the other. You both have to want each other and that's about as accurate as I can put it. Support each other, keep in contact every couple hours (because our lives get busy!), don't freak out if he doesn't text back right away, video chat, etc. Make future plans together, stay involved in each other's lives and goals, be committed, and just learn to remain close to each other regardless of how far apart you are. If you two are really meant to be, it will be. It just takes time and patience

Long Distance?

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