PTSD: Sexual Assault
I suffer from PTSD from childhood sexual assault. I was assaulted twice a week from age 6 to 18. Years of extreme abuse. I was manipulated, threatened, physically, mentally, and emotionally abused ontop of the sexual abuse. I'm finally starting the process of bringing my abuser, my own father, to justice but it's becoming so hard.
I'm mentally and emotionally exhausted. I'm having nightmares and flashbacks, I'm so depressed I can barely eat, I'm getting physically sick from the stress. To top it all off I have to pretend like nothing is happening because the police haven't made their move against him yet.
I'm coping by heavily medicating myself at night to the point where I can barely walk but it helps numb the pain and I don't dream. That dreamless sleep is such a blessing but I know what I'm doing is no better then turning to alcohol or street drugs.
The wait to see a psychiatrist covered by insurance is 7 weeks between visits. I'm trying so hard to keep it together for my kids sake but I can feel myself starting to crack. If I don't do this though I'm putting other young girls at risk and that's not a solution I can live with.
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