Just looking to vent.

It was my grandparents' 50th wedding anniversary over the weekend, which was incredible and amazing. But so I've been married for 7 months, didn't have my period for the first 6 months (went off birth control the same month we were married), got my first period and had my first month of trying to track ovulation with OPKS. Whatever, anyways, I want to be pregnant. I am a 5x Egg donor and know I make precious little babies haha. I am excited and eager to get pregnant. It's just not clicking so far.

But I'm getting really sick of all this pressure. My grandfather cornered me and guilted me, "it'd be really nice to have another baby in the family before I die." Like yes I know it would be great but I can't snap my fingers and be pregnant. I don't even want to admit that we're trying because our parents are leaning more towards us being DINKs (dual income, no kids) and reaping the benefits of not having children (they had kids young). I can't really talk to my friends about things because they are in the mindset of "well aren't we going to a concert in the summer, you can't be pregnant for that" it's just frustrating. Every family event I swear they are in my face about being pregnant. Have to constantly explain, "No I'm just fat now. I'm married. This is my marriage gut."

Constantly being asked about when I'm going to get pregnant just makes me feel like I'm broken and like my marriage is invalid (this last part might be a little melodramatic but I'm annoyed lmao)