Is this marriage worth saving?

Question

Oh my gosh I feel like our marriage is dysfunctional... We argue a lot and we used to believe that we wanted children and now we don't think we do because well for one we don't even have sex! Anytime we try its him going soft or taking too long and me ending it with a hand job. I don't enjoy having sex with him its been like this for too long. Then his job is stressing him out and he is easily irritable, low patience.... He likes to micromanage and have things his way and can't handle it when I critique his way of doing things.

I believe I want kids but now he says he doesn't know if he wants to have any.

Is there really any hope for the relationship when it has been this way for the past three years?

Answer

Try marriage counselling?

Answer

From this post, it honestly doesn't sound like anything that isn't fixable. All marriages go through ups and downs. That's why you vow to be together in good times and in bad. If you love each other and are both willing to put effort into it, it can be fixed, but not without hard work. But if one or both of you doesn't want to fix it, it won't work. Good luck, I hope you do what's best for you.

Answer

This is way too little info to say a firm yes or no. Do you two even know what you're really fighting about? Have you discussed it? And I assuming no counseling. You have let some serious time get away, and the bad sex is only a symptom of the deeper issues. Starting over isn't easy, and the grass ain't always greener somewhere else. Stop the bickering and criticism cycle. Call a truce and just communicate. You both need to be honest, express your needs, dissatisfactions, and come up with a game plan. Sounds like this can be fixed in my opinion.

Answer

IF it's going to be saved, it needs to mutual so if he want to save it (for reasons other than not wanting to be lonely or not wanting to go through a divorce) then give it a shot. However, it sounds like it's been over for a few years now. It probably could've been saved 2 years ago but it seems as though you've both outgrown the relationship, there's no intimacy and you want different things.

Answer

Do either of you care enough to want to save it? If you've both given up, it's kinda the end of the road, especially since you haven't described anything redeeming in your post.

Fwiw, I've been in a similar situation. We tried counseling but all it did was underscore how much his heart wasn't really into saving it. I'm now with someone who's a much better fit for me

Answer

If you are both are in agreement to end it, then end it. If you both want different things, it might not work out anyway, it's a chat you both need to have and decide together what's best for your future. Then go from there. If use want to save it then maybe you should both work a bit harder,nothing worth having is easy, everything needs work and determination it just depends if u want it bad enough! Good luck xx

Is this marriage worth saving?

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