Big wuss...can I go on???

Question

I've been TTC for 4 months now. Tried with partner twice with no fertility drugs, failed. First IUI failed, second IUI this month and also prepping for IVR in a couple months. Went in for my SHG today and it was painful (note I have a low tolerance for pain). Im reading about how HSG is mich more painful. So I'm a big wuss and not looking forward to it. I'm concerned that if I can't handle this, will I be able to handle 9months of pregnancy and then delivery. I have a huge fear of the delivery process. Of course when you're there you just do it, but I'm really getting spooked out now. Considering giving up and adopting. Any thoughts?

Answer

Do you have other pre-existing health conditions? Because I find it interesting you had an IUI during your 3rd month of TTC. As you have probably read it can take healthy couples up to a year to conceive. Can you give your body a break and see if trying naturally works for you?

Answer

I had my SHG on Wednesday, have a high pain tolerance, and it was excruciating. If I was ever asked to do it again, my answer would be no. I don't think it has any bearing on things like pregnancy and labor because there's a motivation for the other two that isn't there for the SHG or HSG. It's also something your body is naturally supposed to do, versus stuff being pumped into your body that your body is fighting against. You can ask your doctor to prescribe some anti anxiety drugs beforehand, but mine didn't really work. It'll probably suck, but it should be over in 10-15 minutes and then you can move on with your life. If you're really worried, you can ask that they do it laparoscopically while you're under. They have to take a polyp from my uterus so that's what they're doing for me instead of the HSG.

Answer

So sorry for jumping to conclusions earlier, it definitely helps the perspective with more details! I definitely don't like to be "that" person but I also get extremely irritated at people that abuse the app. My apologies! Although I am in my late twenties I still completely understand your rush! I don't blame you one bit and I can't imagine how emotional it gets! So I won't even say "don't stress" because I know that's not practical. But if being a biological mom is something you really want then I wouldn't give up on that! Try everything you can! I know that can probably be a lot easier said than done, especially financially, but as long as your husband/partner is on board then I think it's worth it to keep trying. I don't know if this is something you would be interested in but my step mom is 42 and two years ago after a miscarriage she started taking a supplement called Vitex once a day every day and hasn't experienced a single symptom of menopause since then. She's no longer trying to conceive but her doctor says that she could if she wanted to. She loves it and I am currently taking it to hopefully get my body back in sync since I have a hormone imbalance. It may be worth a shot if your afraid of IVF procedures.

Answer

I posted this in haste and was quite emotional so sorry for not including more information. I am 42 and am single so that's the reason why I'm on an aggressive path. My doctor and counselor agrees with my decision to move to IVR given my age. They actually suggested egg donation bc the probability is extremely higher than IUI and IVR (about 45%) for my age group but I explained that's not an option for me as there would be no generic tie, so I might as well adopt (not interested in the 'process', I know some women are but not me, terrified of it). But I want to at least say that I tried. If the IVR doesn't work, then I will happily adopt a baby (it's always been a goal of mine to birth a child AND adopt a child). I have two single friends who've adopted successfully in less than 6 months so that will be my next step after trying these two procedures if not successful. I just have a very low tolerance for pain and with no support, it's very emotional. Hope this provides more context. I really do appreciate those that have commented. I really enjoy this site, your stories are inspiring and I find it to be a virtual support group that's always there. Thanks.

Big wuss...can I go on???

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