Scared

I have to go to court this week to face my ex. I put a temp restraining order on him and I'm just scared out of my mind..there are times I feel absolutely horrible and I miss him terribly like today but I knew it had to be done because of how abusive he was. I want to take it off but I'm scared he'll do the same thing he did before. The last thing I want is to ruin his life..I really do care..