So I got cleared to return to work today.  I'm very nervous about it.  I'm a night shift nurse so I work three, sometimes four 12 hour shifts a week.  I'm breastfeeding my baby and I'm worried about finding time to pump while at work.  I'm nervous about working all night and coming home and taking care of my baby all day then trying to go to work again that night.  I'm afraid of getting so sleep deprived that I'll put my patients' safety or worse, my baby's safety, in danger.  Plus the thought of leaving my baby literally makes me feel ill, like I'm going to hurl.  Just leaving her with my mom for a few hours so I could have a break sent me into tears and stressed me out badly.  I'm a first time mom and this is all so new to me.  I wish I had longer than 6 weeks for maternity leave but I simply can't afford it.  Any other moms out there experiencing the same predicament?  I just don't know what to do.  My stress level is through the roof.