How to cope?

Question

This was my first pregnancy, my fiancé, Cody, and I were over the moon excited when we found out last week! Today I would be five weeks and one day pregnant, not very far along but enough to start imaging the future with a little one. I had been experiencing bleeding and cramping for the past couple of days and today my doctor confirmed I had lost my pregnancy via miscarriage. I know in the grand scheme of everything I am so blessed to have had a positive test in the first place and this does not mean I will never have children, but as we all now, it still hurts. I still have faith I'm going to have a baby, just not at this time.

Cody is very supportive and is the best support system I could ever imagine having in my life. He is my rock and we are together through it all.

For other ladies out there that have had a miscarriage: how did you and your significant other personally cope with a miscarriage?

Answer

I haven't experienced this but I'm sorry for your loss. You have a positive outlook and I think that shows how strong you are.

Answer

First, I am sorry for your loss. Second, lossing a pregnancy, no matter how far along you were will always be painful! The second you see that second line, you fall in love with what is growing inside you. Instant, unconditional love. We lost ours at 12 weeks. It was by far THE most painful experience of my life both emotionally and physically (and Ive given birth via csection!) I started naturally and passed most of the clots but still had a D&C to clean me out. I cried from the second I started bleeding. I completely broke down after the doctor confirmed I no longer had a fetus in my uterus (about 7 hours AFTER I started bleeding). I couldnt help but cry with the most profound sadness and emptiness that I have ever felt.

I was off of work for a week and cried every single day. I beat myself up and cried non-stop. I isolated myself and didnt want to talk or see anyone but my 5 yo son or my SO. My hubby has been beyond supportive. He cried with me in the hospital. He took that Monday off and catered to me. It took us sometime to actually start talking about it. We cope differently. Men cope differently than we do. Be open and honest with him. Today marks exactly a month and when I have my bad days I tell my SO. I tell him exactly how I feel and why I feel it and he just lets me cry. I think it helps for him to know I am still learning to cope.

In short, my advice is to cry and grieve however you want for as long as you want. Dont let anyone tell you otherwise. Something that has helped me cope is that I bought a necklace and a bracelet to honor Baby A #2 (we didnt know the gender). It makes me feel good knowing my unborn baby will never be forgotten. Also, I started exercising again. It helps with the anxiety and panic attacks I kept getting. I wish you luck and much healing. Give yourself time and know that many of us know what you are feeling and going through. If you need to talk or vent, we are here.

Answer

I was 5 weeks as well and cried myself to sleep. A LOT. My boyfriend was sad, but he doesn't show sadness in the same way I do. Sometimes all he could do was just hold me while I sobbed or just listen to me and that would be enough for me. He also left it up to me when we would start trying again which I thought was a lovely gesture. I got one period in between that MC in early January and then found out we were pregnant just after my birthday at the end of February.

My mom and my best friend also helped me a lot. And we're burying our little nugget over the weekend. Was waiting for the ground to soften up. We thought it would be a nice tribute.

Answer

I'm sorry you're going through this. It's extremely hard to say the least. But I promise you it does get easier.
It doesn't matter whether you was 5 weeks pregnant or 5 months, you had already mapped out your future with that baby and it's a huge loss that people won't understand unless they've been through it themselves. 
Thinking of you xx

How to cope?

Let's Glow!

The Top Baby Tracker App: Embrace New Beginnings with Tender Care

The Top Fertility Tracker App: Your Path to Achieving Pregnancy

The Top Pregnancy App: Nurturing Your Journey to Motherhood

The Top Period Tracker for Empowering Your Menstrual Health Journey