What's your opinion? Divorced with kids and living in different states

Question

To the ladies who are divorced and with children... i relocated in 2015. In 2016 my ex husband took me to court for child support and modification for child allocation. I was granted permission to remove my children from the state and it's a joint custody, I also get child support. He can have the kids during summer vacation, we would share the flying expenses meaning he pays one way, I pay the other.

He's closest with my daughter. I told him that if he wants her this summer he should pay to fly her out to him and that when it's time to come back home that I would pay to fly her back to me. Does this seem like a good agreement? I don't trust him and we're not "cool" with each other. I don't wanna pay for her to go to him, then have to pay for her to come back because I know he will say he doesn't have money to send her. Going forward I believe this is how it should be done. If I want her here, I pay. If he wants her there, he pays. What are your thoughts?

Answer

Generally, round trip flights are cheaper, so what I'd do is book a round trip, and before paying for it, get him to etransfer you half of the price for the ticket?

Answer

Yes, it is fair.

I am in a similar situation, with different circumstances. However, my ex who resides in a different state pays to get the children, and I pay for them to come back.

The only thing is my ex is a complete idiot, and waits 6 days before he confirms her travel itinerary, then when he does, its on a buddy pass which is a standby flight, so its not guaranteed (moronic.)

I wouldn't trust him either. If he wants to see your daughter, he pays to retrieve her giving you 30 days advance notice. This enables you to book her flight far enough in advance.

Answer

That is also a good idea MCB had. I also agree with your thoughts on this if you can't afford or don't want to pay the whole thing and per courts it's to be split then yes he should pay her way there and you her way back home. I have 4 children. I was previously married 7yrs and we had 2 children and split. I also had a baby boy with my ex boyfriend of 2 yrs. Between both we had a hard time together but being seperate or divorced now, we are able to get along for the kids. I will sometimes have a hard time getting anything financially out of my ex husband cause he says he pays child support... $40 a week for 2 children should cover everything... it doesn't bother me the money aspect because we tried to not do child support and handle it all on our own but sometimes that doesn't work so I take it in my own hands for what my kids want best and as a parent what is best for them and make that call.

Answer

If it were me, I'd pay for a round trip ticket and take his half off his child support for that month.

Answer

Is there anything in the order stating how expenses for that should be handled. If not i would say you should have that put in so there is no disagreements about it. In some cases a judge has the parent that moved pay the expenses because they chose to move. In other cases its the parent that is to have time with the child pay for getting the child so he would pay to have her come to him and you would pay to have her come back to you. If there isn't anything in your papers about it then its really what you can agree on and you might end up having to pay for the whole thing if you cant agree because if thats his ordered time you can get in trouble and be held in contempt for not sending her.

What's your opinion? Divorced with kids and living in different states

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