engagement envy

Wondering if any other ladies out there are in the same boat as me. I have been with my boyfriend for 5 years. We own a house together and have a dog. I have serious engagement fever. I see other people posting their engagements on social media and immediately become jealous and upset. I want to be happy for my friends but I have so many negative feelings towards it all. I often blame myself for my boyfriend not popping the question yet. We have talked about it and one minute he's all in next he's out. I really don't want to pressure him into anything he doesn't want to do but I'm getting a little impatient. He says he's because of finances but then wants to go buy a new truck or build a new shop. Every time I bring it up he brushes it off like it's nothing and avoids the conversations. I want to just leave it up to him to do but I feel like it will never happen