I think I'm addicted to adderall...

So I was diagnosed with adhd 10 years ago. I was put on medication in highschool but didn't really take it. I started taking it again in college and had been taking it since.

Last April I found out I was pregnant so I quit taking it cold turkey (I was actually taking focalin at the time). I didn't take it my entire pregnancy. Around 2 months postpartum my doctor put me back on a very small dose of the Focalin. It just wasn't the same though. I didn't notice any affects. She increased it to 15mg and it helped, but wore off after only 3 hours and left me drowsy. I asked if I could switch to adderall 20mgXR (what I took back in highschool). She agreed and wrote the prescription. I got it filled and didn't check it, but she had prescribed the immediate release, not XR. I asked the pharmacist and he said I could just return the pills to my doctor and get her to write a new script for the XR. Well, she said I would just have to wait another month. The 20mg IR works great but only lasts like 2-3 hours, so I have been taking 2 or 3 a day. I know I'm going to run out very early and I'm so anxious about it.

I really just can't function without it. I'm so spaced out and I forget everything. I truly need to take it.

I'm very scared that since I'm taking more to make it last longer that when she prescribes the XR next month it won't be enough because I'm getting used to what I am taking.

I have already made an appointment to change doctors but it isn't for another 3 months. I'm so anxious about what to do when I run out. I feel like an addict. I really hate it because if I would have just been put back on what I was on before I was pregnant I feel like this would have never happened.

Before I was pregnant I took 20mg focalin XR in the morning then 5mg IR as needed in the afternoon. It worked perfectly for me. After pregnancy she would only give me 10mgXR. She bumped it to 15 but wouldn't go higher and I felt like an addict calling asking for more. That's why I just requested adderall.

I don't know how to get myself straight. I'm probably going to run out 2-3 weeks early and I don't feel like I'll be able to keep up with everything without it.

I'm just looking for some advice or opinions... 😐