Mental Health

Kait
Hi all. I need some opinions.. I have struggled with depression since I was young and recently my suicidal thoughts have come back. I want to open up to my boyfriend about it, but I'm finding that I just can't talk to him about it. (He also has depression) is it bad that I'm finding it hard to talk to him about it? And can anyone suggest what I should do? Thank you all so much ❤️