Warning: long rant but I would appreciate your opinions. So Friday was our 5 Year wedding anniversary. In the weeks leading up I began asking what he would like to do as we have to arrange a babysitter if we plan to go out and make reservations or buy tickets if we want to do something unique. He just said "I don't know, I haven't thought about it yet". So I do all the leg work on the side coming up with several different ideas, check in the next couple weeks and he still doesn't know because he hasn't bothered to research anything. So I just book it and arrange the sitter. Friday rolls around and when he gets home from work I have a card and present waiting for him and he just says "oh, I didn't get you anything cuz I thought we were doing this tomorrow". To which I said well thats pretty last minute to go shopping for anything tomorrow and our Anniversary is today. But I brushed it off and he opened up his present. Saturday during the day he spends the day working on the car and does his last minute anniversary and mother's day shopping so we didn't have any family time before our date. Before we go on the date, he gives me a card (a combo anniversary / mothers day card) and a few bottles of wine...which was nice but not super thoughtful. He spent more time running around town buying car parts and probably stopped off at the grocery store for my present. Rolling onto to another topic, Mother's Day. I tried my best not to ask him what the plans were since it was my first Mother's Day I wanted to see what he would do without me reminding him or coming up with the plans. His mom ended up calling during the week and asking if we were doing anything, so he was forced to come up with a plan quick. He said he wanted to take us to lunch and the zoo which sounded like fun day so I said yes and asked where we going to have lunch and if we had a reservation....no, we don't obviously because it's Wednesday and he is just coming up with the plan. So I say well you might want to figure that out as most places will be booked on Mother's Day by now. Sunday morning comes around and I was really hoping I would get to sleep in, maybe he would make me breakfast or I would get to just relax on my own while he tended to our 10 month old but nothing happened. As he didn't offer, I pushed him out of bed, he goes downstairs with our daughter and I come down like 30 mins later. As soon as I enter the room she's on the floor fussing and bored and he is just on his phone so I mention she is probably hungry...no reply...so I get her breakfast going and try to drink a cup of coffee while feeding her. I look over and say thanks for saying "Happy Mothers Day" and he says "oh, sorry my mind isn't in the right place from last night" (anniversary date night we stayed up late). Day goes on, no card, no present, no effort to make me feel special with actions or words just feels like a regular day but we're off to the zoo. No restaurant booked, no picnic packed so we grab some fast food. IDK if I am just being ultra sensitive or if this is just what we're labeling a "guy" thing...lack of effort, thought, planning etc. But in the first few years of us dating (11 years ago!) he would do the sweetest romantic gestures on the whim...now I'm the only one coming up with plans or suggestions. I guess I expected more for my first mothers day and wedding anniversary. Gifts don't have to be expensive, but when they are last minute and just some wine I'm not feeling totally appreciated as a wife and the mother of our child. Now I'm wondering if I bring this all up or just let it go...he'll probably just turn the tables and sarcastically say he is so sorry for being such a disappointment...blah blah blah. What do you ladies think?