What to do

Question

My boyfriend of 6 months has depression and bipolar issues and at times wants to break up. I usually am able to calm him down and he realizes he needs me I need him etc. But last night he said we're on a break. That he doesn't know if he still loves me and that he needs me as a friend right now. I'm fine with waiting for him to be okay with us again, but how long is too long of waiting? And should I try to do anything to keep him happy in this break time?

Answer

All you can really do is be there for him and if it goes on for months and he just doesn't get back together then idk if you should continue that any longer. If he can't make his mind up then you shouldn't have to put your love life on hold for that long it's not fair to you. My bf has depression and is bipolar too so I understand the frustration sometimes and then the comfort he needs of needing me so just be here for him help him through whatever he's feeling and give it a few months

Answer

First of all he needs to get on Meds and therapy. It will stabilize his moods, help him to think more clearly. Etc. Are you on a break so he can be with other people without feeling guilt. You need to define what can and can't happen. Maybe the relationship has run its course. 6 months to a year is when the honeymoon phase is over. People put on their best face in the beginning. Tell you what you want to hear to get what they want. You learn what you can and can't tolerate. And if you want to continue either wasting your time or build a relationship. All you can do is be patient and understanding or bail out. Those are your options. It's hard to be with someone with mental illness. My guy's has bipolar and depression. Been with him 4.5 years. I've seen him cry and stressed etc. But he's medicated and goes to therapy and it helps. I'm the most patient and understanding and comforting person. I've learned to be a listener. Not to solve his problems but be supportive. He bounces from jobs and I support him in between but he always figures it out. Sometimes he. Reds space and I give it to him. We never fight or argue. I keep him calm. He's respectful and are best friends and get along great. You have a lot of thinking to do. If you want to stay or be his friend or jump ship because it's too much to deal with. Good luck.

Answer

He did say he wanted you as a friend during this time, so remain that. You said you don't know if you should do anything to keep him happy, well just be nice to him. You know he has those problems. Maybe give him a little space tho to work on himself, and maybe then he'll realize what he actually wants, meaning to be w you, just friends, etc. don't wait forever. I know 6 months is a long time, but you can't put your life on hold just for him to realize you're worth it.

What to do

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