I kind of find it embarrassing that I'm 16 and haven't even had my first boyfriend yet. Some of my friends are in committed relationships and I'm just sitting here. I had a crush on a guy who ended up being a jerk and then a guy asked me out and I felt so bad telling him no because I know how it feels, then he wouldn't leave me alone so I called him a douche to get him to go back to his table. I've felt bad since then. I just don't know what to do. I'm embarrassed and upset. I thought I'd be in a relationship by now. I haven't even had my first kiss yet. I need to get this off my chest but yet I still don't feel good about it. It's like a dark depressing cloud that's always going to be here.