I have always wanted a big family. It took 7 months before I got pregnant with baby #1 so not bad. But during the pregnancy I had a severe case of hyperemesis Gravidarum. It lasted my entire pregnancy. Until about 30 weeks they gave me Ivs to keep me hydrated since I couldn't keep anything down. I was on four differ anti nausea meds and it barely helped. I ended up losing 35 lbs by the time I was 9 months. I gave birth to a healthy baby boy and he is the light of my life. It has been a little over a year and a half since he was born and I have forgotten a lot of the pain I went through to get him here. I want another baby so badly and have been trying for the last 11 months. But a part of me is almost relieved when I find out I'm not pregnant each month and another part of me is devastated. I'm terrified to go through that pain again. It was the hardest nine months of my life, but I love my son so much and it was so worth it. I guess it is a little harder committing to another pregnancy knowing how bad it could be. I am diligently trying to get pregnant and I am willing to go through all the pain again, but I am truly scared. Am I totally crazy? Has anyone else gone through this same situation? I'd love to talk to someone who understands.