So let's just all be honest, when you find out your pregnant it's the best feeling in the world.. Well for me it's a nightmare. After having loss after loss, finding out I'm pregnant is filled with fears. I know why I miscarry. My body is not like the normal woman out there. So I found out I was pregnant a few days ago, while thrilled I was also apprehensive. I took my kids to the zoo today for my 5 years olds birthday and began having a chemical. Severe cramps and bleeding. Now I had to hide my sadness and continue through the damn zoo like nothing was happening. Until now while I lay in my bed just completely sadden. FUCK my stupid body and it's inability to properly make and keep babies!!!! 😢😭😭😢😢