For a long time growing up, me and my mother never had a healthy relationship. When she's angry she tends to say things that hurt and some days I'm too tired and other times I just start arguing with her because I don't understand why she feels it's okay to say the hurtful things she says. I will never forget the first time I told her I hated her when I was 7 for hitting me over something so small like spilling something on the carpet (I don't exactly remember what it was) and her saying "I wish you would die" those words right there have been engraved in my brain. And ever since then I just feel like my mother is only raising me because of the title of her being a mother but not because she loves me or is proud of me or greatful to have me as her daughter. And its like I don't want to live with her anymore.. I just want to get pregnant by my boyfriend and go live with him. Only because I'm starting to really hate my mom and I hate thinking like that'll solve my problems but idk what else to do i just can't stand her voice it's so bad. Because she's my mom.. I shouldn't feel or think that way but I do for years I have