2 years TTC this month

If i get AF this month (which i always do) it will officially be 25 months TTC .. i was pregnant when i was 19 from sexual abuse from a physically abusive partner and i terminated.. now that ive been with my fiance for 5 years and we want kids together, we cant. He has had a semen analysis and they said his morphology is at 4% (right under the line of being considered infertile) ... we tried adapting healthier lifestyles but for the most part nothing has changed... i wouldnt say ive given up but i dont track anything anymore. I barely use this app. Its so discouraging. 2 of my ex gfs just told me theyre pregnant. My 21 year old sister had a baby in feb and even one of my best friends who was supposed to be infertile due to her RH disease, endometriosis, and other things just had a baby this afternoon... every body but me. We are atheists (sorry) but we do believe in the universe making things happen when theyre supposed to ... I try to keep that in mind... but its hard. We are more ready in every way than all of them put together and yet we are left with nothing. How do i keep it together? At what point do we start looking into other options? I feel so hopeless