I've been in therapy for three years now because of sleep problems (nightmares) and anxiety. This past year, I tried Prozac, Lexapro, and Sirtraline, but none of them worked. Lexapro worsened suicidal thoughts, Prozac just didn't work and neither did sirtraline. Fine. My doctor at the time was no longer comfortable with prescribing me medicine, and my therapist couldn't do it. My therapist then starts telling me that my irritability is getting worse and it has been most of the year. I notice my sleep getting worse. 

Then, finally, I reach the worst day of my life so far. Today I went to a psychiatrist to try, one again, with medicine, only to find out that I have Bipolar Disorder... 

Honestly this medicine terrifies me because it can give me a rash that can kill me and if I decide to go on birth control the risk worsens. I was wondering if anyone had any advice? Or knows of other things I can do to manage it along with the medicine (Lamotrigine)?

Thank you so much for answering! It means a lot and I definitely feel better about this now ☺️☺️