He's known I've always wanted to get married, and it seemed he was on the same page for a while, and then a year or so after our son was born, I get the truth that he's not too keen on the idea since both his parents were highly unsuccessful (each bring married and divorced 2-3 times).  I've thought that maybe as time has gone on, he would warm up to it and have a change of heart.

I'm four months pregnant with our second child, and the other day after checking out a new home to rent, during a conversation that turned to marriage and making a snide comment, I said, "I don't get why you're so against marriage", he replied that good relationships get ruined when you make it "official by law".  This coming from a man who gets so excited when friends get married and tells me all the time when someone he knows just got married.  I want to punch him in the damn face and call him a lying hypocrite.  Don't act like you're so stoked when you think it's crap and won't do it yourself!  I'm so angry and disappointed that I have to accept that this big dream for myself is gone 😭. I love him and am not going anywhere, but I can't help but have a part of me resentful that I've given him what he wanted most (being a father) and I'll never be his wife.  He said I can always just change my last name to his without getting married, but it's not the same thing at all!!! Ugh. Just needed to vent...