... Confuse and scared

Matilda
I'm 9 days late ladies... I've been cramping so mad it feels like mentrual cramps. I'm scared to take a test and very confuse on how i would react with either negative or positive... I had my first miscarriage last year in August 3 days after i found out i was 6wks. I still cry about it because i felt like i couldn't protect my child inside of me and bleeding so much didn't help it was the most emotional pain i ever went through, so i guess you can see why I'm so scared. Its like this if its negative i will feel bummed about it if its positive i will feel scared especially with these awful cramps. Ovulation window stared on the first thru the sixth i took two preg test like a most 2wks ago both negative... Anybody ever went through this?