I apologize for the long post in advance...For the the past year in my relationship of two years I've been thinking a lot about it. I'm know to overthink things and over react. Me and my boyfriend are still in high school and this year we are seniors. I have problems trusting him for a few reasons. He's lied to me about doing drugs and drinking, even though I told him I have a huge problems with drugs because my parents were drug addicts. He lied about doing drugs more than 4 times. He was snapchatting other girls and was okay with receiving nudes from them. He's lied to me about where he was just to avoid me. He's done many more things, but he's done nothing to earn it back and blames me for being mad and not being able to let go of these things when he dosent even see them as an issue. I'm very protective I'm my relationships mainly because I care a lot about the people in my life. When his friends are around he treats me like I don't exsist until he sees I'm upset. His friends have always came first. He makes me feel so worthless but blames me feeling that way. I try and talk to him about how I'm feeling considering I suffer from depression anxiety and ptsd, but he uses my mental disorders against me. He never accepts that he could possibly be the problem. Next comes one of the main problems I have...sex. Don't get me wrong I'm okay with doing it, but there's just sometimes I'm really really not in the mood. But he'll do it anyways. I'll be on my period and really not feeling sexy and just want to sleep but he'll continue to pull my pants down and do as he pleases. I've told him I've been feeling used lately, but he says he's nkt and that I'm over thinking things. If I'm sleeping and he wakes up in the middle of the night and is horny he'll just basically rape me. Maybe if I'm in the mood it's okay but most of the time he just likes to have his way with me. I've just felt so emotionally drained lately. For some reason I still love this guy because I believe in forgiveness and fixing what's broken but I just don't want to get myself trapped in an emotionally abusive relationship I don't even realize is happening. What's making it even harder is that if I leave him, I'm leaving his family to. And they have really been a big part in my life and they like me so much. My family is not the best and they've really made me feel welcome. I just need some advice. If you want anymore information feel free to ask. I'm just really trying to understand what's to come in my relationship and if I should get out while I can.