So I'm in china now and the first couple days I met a guy from Britain and holy crap he's gorgeous! But he's like funny as and motivated and we come from the same kinda lifestyle. We both came here to do something with our lives and kinda feels like we were supposed to meet each other.

But that's naive female feelings talking there in reality he's a total fuck boi and all ways I get this vibe of "your not his type your so awkward and weird looking he can and will do so much better then you you tool" like we've had sex twice but anyone could tell it meant nothing to him so I play it off like "nah man I don't like you like that come on we mates" but no. No I'm falling hard. 

Anyway so I came to shanghai a couple of days ago to stay with him and find a job but I'm finding it hard not to get down and depressed at the fact that this incredible man who I will never ever forget is so close yet so far out of my reach it really hurts. Just pretending the sex means nothing to both of us and I'm just not "sexy" enough for him. I'm just.....awkward. I don't know any advice? Like personality wise we get along like a house on fire, that will never be enough though. Just doomed in the painful 'friend zone'