would this annoy you?

Question

My husband and I dated when we were in highschool broke up did our own thing. He had a girlfriend during the couple of years we weren't together. We got back together got married. His ex girlfriend is now extremely close with his sister when they never were before, like to the post his sisters bringing her to family events and bringing her to his parents house etc.  his ex girlfriends family invited him and I to a Fourth of July party. I feel they shouldn't of invited him and I feel his sister shouldn't be bringing her around at all. Especially after the ex cheated on him and did him wrong. But the sister feels my husband should just get over it and how the ex and I should be friends.  What should I do? There's no talking to the sister about it because she just freaks out and thinks everyone's wrong. And to top it off we're planning on having a real ceremony wedding where his sister is a brides maid. I'm to the point where I don't want her in it. I'm open to advice here...

Edit: 
I'm not trying to control who the sister is friends with, but she's been talked to because we believe the only reason the ex is friends with her is to get to my husband. When the sister was spoken to she acted like a child and freaked out and didn't come home for 3 days because his family didn't want his ex coming around.

Answer

I totally understand why that would be annoying. And it would definitely get under my skin. But unfortunately it is her friend, and you can't really tell her who she can and can't be friends with.

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I would feel that the ex is only friend with his sister because of your husband I'm sure she can be friends with a million other people why choose her exs sister

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Yeah it's annoying but you can't dictate who she can be friends with.

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You really can't control Who she is friends with. You don't have to have her in your wedding and you don't have to go to any functions where the ex is invited or to the family of the ex's party, and you don't have to be friends with the ex at all. That's your choice, that's what you can control in the situation. But you simply cannot control anyone else.

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The sister can be friends with whoever she wants. And you and your fiance just shouldn't go to the ex's house or invite her to the wedding.

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I would HATE THAT. Like seriously hate that. Maybe family events should be FAMILY ONLY.

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I went through a similar situation. I found it difficult too. It caused lots of family drama for my husband and I. Especially since he left his ex to marry me. He was the one to tell his sister that she needs to choose family over his psychotic ex girlfriend. It got to the point where his much older sister was going out to lunch and posting pics on social media of the 2 of them. She eventually moved on but I still can't trust someone who would openly try to bother me so much when I'm her own sister in law vs. An ex girlfriend. It made no sense.

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Not sure how close you and sister in law are but she is showing zero loyalty towards you, it's simply dysfunctional to bring a girl that not only cheated but was romantically involved with your husband, she's subjecting you to a lot of unneeded drama and feelings and honestly at this point I'd stop talking to her as she's showing she does not give two scraps about you and her brothers feelings. She should not be in your wedding!

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Wow no respect at all. Personally id leave. Too much drama. That's just me though

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My husband was with his ex for a long time and his sister and her became good friends. His sister has pictures of them when they would go out back when my hubby and her were dating and with my sis in law in the pics. These pics are all over her old room in my mother in laws home. My sis in law also told me that she would be inviting the ex to her wedding and hey it's her wedding and I totally understand that they stayed friends even though the ex cheated on my husband and my husband left her. She'll just be a guest as where I will be a bridesmaid. They were young when they dated and just kids. It doesn't bug me, it's the past. It's not a big deal unless you make it a big deal.