Prenup???

Question

Ok so ladies I have been in a relationship on and off for 20 yrs. We are engaged and been talking about the wedding well today he tells me that he wants a prenup first to protect both of us if we ever get divorced. Idk what to do I'm hurt and really insulted. Should I get the prenup? Or leave him😞

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Update: after just not bringing it up after awhile he decided it was stupid and we are officially not getting a prenup😊we are looking into IUI and hoping we get our miracle baby soon😊🙏🙏🙏

Answer

There's a joke I heard that goes with this concern:

Why do hurricanes always have female names? 
Because they're wet and wild when they arrive and then leave with your house and car.

It seems like women tend to get everything during a divorce. I'd encourage a prenup just to show good faith and for his benefit.

Answer

I honestly don't see why everyone gets so insulted by prenups. My mom and step dad have one. They don't plan on divorcing but they did it to protect themselves. My mom bought the house we live in prior to meeting my step dad and my step dad has his own business. Things change over time, of course nobody goes into a marriage thinking they're going to divorce but sometimes it happens. My parents definitely aren't in the mindset that they will get divorced but God forbid it happens and they do my mom won't lose the house that she bought on her own and my step dad won't lose half of his business. In your case you probably have student loans etc. and I honestly don't think that should be his responsibility to pay if things go wrong. Maybe it's just my mindset but when my parents got married OSAP (government funding for schooling) wanted to give me less money because I then had a dual income family and I fought it because I don't think my step dad is responsible for paying my schooling. There's no reason to be insulted.

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Think of it as a good thing- that if you split up, you'd know exactly who owned what and owed what. Does one of you spend more/make more? Will you have lots of debt? If you got fertility treatments, who would pay?

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It's not as easy as yes/no. You need to talk it out. Discuss what assets you have, and if they really need to be protected. Don't take it personally, you have to be smart.

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There is nothing wrong with them people get them all the time

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After 20 years, if he still wants a prenup, something is wrong in your relationship.

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I don't get why girls get so insulted by a prenup. That's like getting offended when someone tells you you should get health insurance. You are protecting yourself INCASE something happens. It's not like you go to your planner and right "November 3rd break arm" like NO. it's IN CASE your broke your arm. Health insurance is for things you don't expect to happen and a prenup is the same thing. You are going to planner and writing in "November 3rd fuck up marriage" are you? No. Or at least I hope not.

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No ma'am! & and I actually have more money then my man but I come from a traditional views when we are married you're stuff is my stuff and my stuff is your stuff!!! I don't think of the negative I trust God will keep us happy and together

Answer

Just make sure you have your own lawyer look it over and make sure it protects you as well!

Prenup???

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