How often do you and your SO fight? What's normal? And what's not?

Question

We're so good together but we've been arguing more regularly lately. The make up is amazing and we're usually closer than ever afterwards but I was just wondering when do you draw the line? When does it become toxic? How do you and your partner handle it?

Answer

In the past, I had been actually quite abusive to my boyfriend. I'm fortunate enough to be with the best man in the world and he understood my past and works on my behavior with me. We've had a really amazing relationship, specifically this past year. We don't argue as in a yelling match. It doesn't escalate to that. But on occasion, one of us will do something and just be annoyed with the other person. I can't exactly give a quantitative answer for how often as it just sort of depends. If my mood is low, I'll probably be more irritable. I would say it becomes toxic when it's harmful and one or both of you feels scared or hesitant to bring up a problem. For example, if your significant other keeps leaving stuff everywhere and you are afraid to tell them "hey could you not do that" then I'd say that's probably unhealthy.

Answer

My boyfriend and never fight. We've been together for over 3yrs and our only fight was back when we broke up due to me moving away and the separation resulted in us fighting. Prior to our break up we were together 8 months and never fought then either. So in the 4ish years we've been together we have never actually fought. 
We do disagree on things and there have been issues and minor 'arguments'. However, we just sit and talk about it calmly. We listen to each other and then discuss options and reach a conclusion together as a team. Sure I've been angry with him and he's been angry with me, but it's never caused a fight, just a disagreement that gets discussed immediately (or after a little breathing space). We have a rule where we never go to bed angry so we have to discuss any issue or potential issue as soon as it arises and solve our differences. 
I love our relationship and how easy it is. Our communication is amazing. I couldn't be with someone I fought with- an occasional fight maybe, but regular fighting would drive me insane. My ex was emotionally abusive and we never fought either. But we also never communicated- I would try and he'd shut me down. So resentment was a huge issue (among many others) for us. It took me a while to actually open up to my boyfriend about issues. But he made me promise not to hide my feelings and he promised to always listen to me when something was wrong. And that ended up in us just communicating without fighting even when we disagree or are upset with the other person.

Answer

In all honesty never. Been with my guy almost 5 years. We don't even raise our voices at each other. We talk calmly. I'm not the over react and flip out type.

Answer

Hardly ever, but when we do argue its over dumb stuff and we both go in separate rooms then come back and talk. 
Communication is key and make up sex is blah like I don't want to be touched so that is not an option and he says when I'm being a bitch like why would he wana be in the mood for sex? So doesn't happen. 
We never go to bed angry at each other though that's not healthy. And we always say we love you to each other even when mad at each other because you never know when it will be your time.

Answer

I find make up sex repulsive honesty.  When I'm pissed, I want absolutely nothing to do with anyone.
That said, my husband and I never argue.  We never did when we firsr met, and we don't now, almost 6 years later.  If we have a discussion and it starting to become heated,  one of us leaves the room. I usually go outside and look at the sky for half an hour.  And always, whenever we both come back in the same room, one of us will apologies and then the other follows with an apology as well. We have not had an argument that escalated. Last time we raised our voices , it was over who gets to feed our daughter at the 5 am feeding.  And I only raised my voice because I was up until 2 am putting her down , after I gave oragel for teething and walked around with her till asleep. In the morning,  I apologized and he said I didn't have to become be should have been up already and it was his fault.
We don't fight. We never fight. We communicate. When that fails, we go take a quick breath of fresh air . 
Arguing, fighting,  bickering is never "healthy " . People should be able to communicate and walk away when that fails. Then apologize,  regardless of who's wrong.  Both apologize. Give hugs,  kisses , smiles and move on with it

How often do you and your SO fight? What's normal? And what's not?

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