Any advice is welcome, ttc & not be bitter

Markie
I just needed a place to turn, me and my SO are ttc, had my second chemical pregnancy with him this weekend and my third all together. It's hard not really having anywhere to turn because my sisters and friends who are not in the best positions to have children just continously reproduce. I try not to be bitter towards them and be happy, but it's hard when I'm in a more stable, family oriented position for a child and I just can't seem to keep one. I know it sounds selfish and egotistical, and i honestly dont mean for it to be, but its just getting harder and harder its even getting harder to talk to my SO. He's starting to get extremely worried about my health and its starting to get difficult to hide his frustration because he wants a big family and already has a 5 year old son.. I'm waiting on my OBGYN to call back so I can try to get some answers as to why, it just doesn't change the situation.