So, first of all I'd like to declare that I am NOT a possessive girlfriend. My boyfriend has a few friends who are female and I really like them - one of which I get on great with and would consider a good friend of my own too. I'm happy with my boyfriend having female friends and I'm very much against controlling relationships as I've suffered one with a previous boyfriend. I'd never dictate to my boyfriend who he can and cannot be friends with.

However, he had this one friend last year and, as much as I have tried to, I honestly cannot stand the girl and whenever he talked about her jealousy would just rage inside me. I don't know why. I've never been like that. They went to the same college class one year and that's how they became friends. At that point, like all his other female friends, I didn't have any issues at all and I was absolutely fine with it.

During November last year though, I noticed that she started calling him a lot. I found that a bit weird but didn't say anything because I honestly didn't want to make it a thing when it probably wasn't. Then, the calls got consistent. She would call him daily, calls would last for hours at a time. Since my boyfriend gets anxiety on the phone and can't even talk to me for even an hour when I'm away from our home I found that really unusual and honestly, got quite jealous at it. One night, they spoke on the phone for six hours straight. Who can even do that?

I told my boyfriend that I found it really weird and that it got to me a bit. He told me that she has a lot of issues and he didn't want to betray her trust by telling me them but that he wanted to be there for her. That made me feel better since he is really kind. He wouldn't see any of his friends go without and I know he was acting from good intentions. To ease my mind, he invited her out to our house so that I could meet her and I was happy about that.

The first time she came to our house, she was there from like 12:00 in the afternoon until 2:00 in the morning. That's really late for me but I don't like being a buzzkill so I was fine with that. She asked to use our shower though which made me feel really uneasy and I thought was quite strange but she got dressed and undressed in the bathroom so at no point was she around my boyfriend inappropriately or anything. I felt a bit better after meeting her and I thought maybe I was just overreacting before.

The next time she came to my house I wasn't there but from what my boyfriend said she was there for similar hours to the first time. One day after college, my boyfriend called me and said the girl was having problems with a boy she liked who was friends with my boyfriend, so she asked him to send his friend messages pretending that he liked her to see what his friend would say. Like, to see if my boyfriend's friend liked her. When my boyfriend told me he did it I was so upset. Like, really bad. The thought of him telling someone he likes her made me furious and quite depressed to be honest. I know he doesn't like her, but the thought of it hurt a lot. I went back to really feeling uneasy around her too. Why would she even ask him to do that? She knew he had me in his life, knew he had a girlfriend, so why ask him to say something like that? It just made me really angry tbh.

Then she came back out to the house again. I'm a complementary therapist so I have a massage bed and oils in my house to give treatments from home. While she was here, she asked me to give her a massage, which I agreed to. The treatment went fine and it was obviously conducted in a room with just me and her, I wasn't worried about anything. After the treatment though, I left the room to let her get dressed and I went into the room my boyfriend was in. Five minutes later the girl came in with a towel wrapped around her saying that she left her bra in her bag or something? She grabbed her bra, laughed and walked back out... I didn't even know how to feel at that point. My boyfriend didn't once look at her, he's honest and genuine and I wasn't worried about him liking her at all - at this point I knew that she liked him though. She was clearly flirting with him blatantly in front of me and that left me so dumbfounded!

Later on that night she told me that she's asked my boyfriend to buy her a sex toy. She said she wants a vibrator but doesn't want to buy one herself, she wants it as a gift. My boyfriend looked quite disgusted. From that moment on I made my feelings very clear. I told my boyfriend how much I really didn't like her. I didn't want her near our home, I was sick of her calling him and even if he told her that he was spending the day doing something with me, she'd still call! One time she even said to him, "you know, couples should spend some time apart from each other"... we hadn't done anything together in weeks because she was constantly calling him or coming to our house!

My boyfriend ended up not talking to her so much and then not at all. He sent her a message one day to see if she was okay (she had a lot of problems that she'd talk to him about remember) and she sent him a picture of her in bed with another man, clearly just after having sex and wrote "much love" with love heart emoji...

He hasn't spoken to her in months and we've been very happy and everything but it was his birthday last week and she messaged him with birthday wishes which is fine. She also asked if she could come down for a massage from me though. The second I heard that I felt instantly jealous and angry and upset all over again. Technically, she hasn't done anything so I feel so stupid for getting this upset. Am I out of line or are my feelings justified?