I cry if I enjoy sex

I know this might sound weird, but whenever I enjoy sex I feel ashamed of myself. I feel guilty and like I don't deserve to enjoy it, that if I enjoy it that I'm a slut, or later on if I'm forced to do something by someone people will say I asked for it because I enjoy it. I don't think other people are slutty for liking sex, not at all. In fact, I support people having casual sex if they want to and I'll defend them until I'm blue in the face. I don't think people's libido is an argument against rape, but for some reason I judge myself differently. Any time I feel something from sex I immediately make my boyfriend stop and I cry. I used to cry when we did anything, and I got over that but I just can't shake the guilt I feel whenever I have sex with my boyfriend. (He never makes me do anything and he supports my choice not to have sex a lot but I force myself to do it a lot because I feel so stupid for being this way, and I know a part of me wants it). Edit: I wasn't sexually assaulted but I was attacked when I was young by a boy who pinned me down, slapped my ass, felt me up and slammed my head off a pole. The experience resulted in me developing anxiety and depression. I think it does have a huge influence on how I feel about sex