so about half a year ago my boyfriend had to move because of work and he didn't know anyone in the area plus it was close to my college so instead of going home for the summer and instead of staying on campus i was like "ok i'll go with you" it's not THAT far from where we both lived anyway it was just a lot to go back and forth everyday, so i've been staying with him and i thought staying would him would great, we'd get more privacy, we'd get to spend more time together, but he doesn't enjoy it because like i said he doesn't know anyone in the area, he doesn't like being away from friends and family, so we both go stay with our families during the weekend to see them and our friends. but the thing is we NEVER spend time together outside of the house. the only two places we spend time together is the house and the gym. anytime i ask him to do anything he's either tired, or he doesn't want to spend the money, and it could be something simple like getting ice cream. he says that's partly just because he doesn't like staying where we are, so i'll ask him to spend time together on the weekends but weekends are "for the boys" and i just need to start off by saying, i'm not mad at him for wanting to spend time with his friends, i understand that we don't have to spend every second together, i truthfully get jealous because he actually is… i don't know what word to use, i guess present when he's with his friends. like he's excited and he actually enjoys his time, when i see him after a weekend he goes on and on about the list of things he did with his friends and eventually i'm just like "well… why are you always too tired, or you don't want to spend money, or you just don't feel like it anytime i want to do something" and as much time as we spend together, i feel somewhat lonely. here's an example of how he doesn't do anything with me, but he will with his friends, there's a little arcade at the mall and i said we should go because he works in the evening and i didn't have to work that day, but he said he didn't want to spend the money. the SAME weekend he went on a random trip to baltimore with his friends and they stayed in a hotel, which even between him and his other six friends if they split the price of a room, not even thinking about food and gas, it's way more than what i was asking from him, the most we could've spend at the arcade is what? $20 between the two of us? probably not even that. during my first year of school (before he had to move for work obviously) i used to always ask him to come visit me but he didn't feel like driving and he didn't want to spend the money on gas, and i somewhat got it because he worked in the evenings so it would be annoying to come visit me and then try to be back at work by 5, but again, why are you too tired to come visit your girlfriend but you're ready to do anything your friends want to do. when i was in school i was honestly just unhappy, my doctor said i showed signs of depression, so i wouldn't always reach out to people, but because of this and (this is something i noticed he does with his family too, it isn't just me) my boyfriend will get distracted and forget to respond or to call people, but we would go days at a time without talking and it just sucked because i felt like no one cared that i was gone, but despite him doing it with me and his family, he talks to his friends everyday. he goes out with his friends EVERY weekend, and all my friends work on the weekends so i spend my weekends alone EVERY weekend. to go back to what i said before, he's present when he's with his friends, when i'm with him i know he doesn't like being away from what he considers home, so it in turn feels like he's not really enjoying his time with me. like when we're together we just sit on the opposite ends of the couch and either watch tv or he plays a video game while im on my laptop and it almost feels like i might as well be by myself. i feel like he's dating his friends and i'm just his roommate. i cook pretty much every night, i clean, i'll bring him lunch to work, i just try my hardest everyday to make his days easier and he doesn't notice, which the other day he did admit that he takes me for granted and apologized and said i deserve for him to start acknowledging me, i don't really know if this means he's going to act different or not 🤷🏽‍♀️ but anyway, if his friends save him leftover pizza they're the greatest people in the world. please don't be quick to jump to "break up with him," he doesn't realize that i feel this way and i feel like to have never let him know something's bothering me and then just jump into something so permanent while never giving him the chance to fix the problem. but i've felt this way for a while, and i always tell myself you know like its not that big a deal, i always tell myself i'm overreacting so to just leave it alone and get over it, but i keep telling myself this over and over and as much as i love my boyfriend i keep telling myself nothing's wrong but i'm starting to feel disconnected. i feel like the way i'm feeling is valid, i'm not crazy right? i don't know how to talk about this with him, i struggle to tell people when something's wrong, i always told make myself feel like i'm overreacting and the way i'm feeling is stupid, plus i always cry which makes it harder for me to get across what's bothering me 😕