So I have online friends I met a few years ago. One of them is a guy I always had a crush on and such and such. I always wanted to talk to him because he made me happy but after a while he began to be distant and barely replied. So I started sending him less than okay pictures. It started with just the butt and he would give me attention. Something that I craved and I guess that i didn't receive enough of it at home and I became addicted to it. I was underage and still am at this point. Stupid I know and it's all considered child porn technically since I am underage. Sorta recently (a few months ago or less) it went to topless pictures. All without my face of course and on Snapchat, I never went below the belt in the front however. He never screenshotted them and most of them were photoshopped to remove any identifiable birthmarks. Recently I've been by the guilt bomb and can't help imagining telling my mom which I just can't bring myself to do because I know she would react like the world would be ending and my life would be over. I just wanna stop existing or die or forget that I did it or reverse time and stop myself from ever doing it. I don't know why I did it other than for attention. I have no idea why I'm feeling so much guilt when I haven't even sent a picture lately. Please don't be harsh i just had to get this off my chest. I wish I could carve out the memories of me doing this from my brain.