Vent for a min....just lost

Kristin • Married 2014👰🏼 miscarriage October 2014🌈baby boy December 2015💙 baby girl due July 2020💕
I'm on cycle day 69, still nothing. No period, no bfp.... Have a doc appt next Friday and it can not come soon enough 
I had a mc in October and ever since I have been so irregular. Feels like will never happen.
I swear everyone on Facebook is either pregnant or having babies. I'm happy for them but not oblivious that I'm jealous and the thought'it should have been me' passes thru. 
Having a tough week, for anyone else going thru this you're not alone.