So I really need to get something off my chest. I've been living with this condition my entire life and it wasn't until recently my family found out. Well...Most of my immediate family anyway. The smallest mistake.s trigger me and I'll either be on the verge on a panic attack or have a full meltdown. I mean my body becomes tense, my hands will shake nonstop, I'll sweat and avoid eye conact with anyone, and worst of all I have somewhat suicidal thoughts when I'm triggered. It could be anything small like getting into the wrong checkout line when buying items at grocery store or even having to talk to the cable guy. My mother, for awhile, didn't believe me. My sibling knew I had it but not to the extent it actually is. Eventually they saw it first hand and I thought, "finally maybe my mom will get me some help." but I was wrong she just wanted me to wait and deal with 'it'. I knew the truth she was afraid of my father. He was never a good dad but I'll spare the details because I dont want people telling I need to get away because I can't. If he ever found out about my going to therapy for this issue it would tear my family apart. My parents have come close to divorce before and this might be the straw that breaks the camels back. He believes psychologists and therapist or people who work in the medical field are only in it for the money . He would call me stupid for believing them. My dad is the root of many other issues I have but I've finally overcome them. I want this to be my final achievement in healing myself. P.S.: my mother is one of the most amazing women I've ever met , what happened was a small mistake which I forgiven for. Btw sorry for the long post I just needed some way of getting it all out.