This pregnancy road that I'm on is the most stressful thing ever. I'm overly sensitive, can't control my emotions, and I'm scared and I get annoyed easily.

I had to quit my job due to mental and physical issues I've been having. When I was younger I've dealt with depression really bad and was self harming. it was bad that I had to be sent to a hospital for a month.

I feel myself going back to that path and it's terrifying because I don't want to be this way. my husband doesn't touch me, and when I ask for a back rub he sighs and he will do it for two mins. He's always on the computer streaming his video games and when he's not doing that he's in the chat room with people on his phone. but when I tell him to put his phone down he gets mad and that we do spend time together which is not true.

I'm not the person who is needy or a pusher. I'm the person where if I get a no multiple times. I will never ask again. we sleep in different bedrooms from time to time. when times get tough and he says remarks I tend to cry and I harm myself by scratching deep into my skin. I'm disconnected with my husband and I feel like it's going to get worse.

at times I just want a week without him and just go to my parents house. I just have no one to talk to. I want help. I need it. but I want my husband to understand that I'm alone. and I feel alone.