The past present and future

so this time last year I was pregnant and didn't know, the 29th I found out and it's a day I'll never ever forget..sadly it didn't all go to plan and I was a selfish cow. Now I can't help but want a baby so badly I'm 21 and so is my partner I want a baby and he doesn't so I have no choice but to wait...which I don't thinks fair, basically I gotta wait till he's ready which could be years from now:( also my baby cousin is having her baby on Wednesday and I can't help but cry because I just want what she has and I can't:(