Moms!!! Is it me???? MIL driving me crazy since baby came home.

Question

So my whole family lives out of state. I'm just down the road from my in laws, they're fine, but you know, they're still the in laws. My MIL has come over every 2 days since we came home with our baby! She asks her son (my husband) every time she wants to come. I'm annoyed! IM the one primarily taking care of our newborn so WHY is she going around me when she wants to  come over. Also can we talk about the frequency?!?  Every 2 days!!! I'm so annoyed. Mind you, this is their first grandchild. But it's also my first baby and I just want sone time alone!!! Am I being a brat?? How would you feel? Should I say something? I feel bad because she always brings food over and she stocked our fridge while I was in the hospital. Still tho...😒

Answer

Girl I'm right there with you. I have an overbearing MIL too. In the very beginning of the pregnancy, people would tell me that she was just so excited. But now that I'm 9 days from delivering, people see just how over the top it can be. You need to establish boundaries with her and with your husband too in terms of her coming by.

Answer

She means well. Maybe she's being considerate by asking him instead, since you are the primary caretaker. I'd be glad to have the help, maybe give her an hour limit if it bothers you that much? The last thing you and your husband need along with a newborn is family problems, especially with his mom.

Answer

Same here! Baby girl is coming any day now and my MIL is already extra. Since she found out we were pregnant, she tells me what to do, and what I'm doing wrong. Yesterday we had a false labor after going to the hospital... she came over that evening to tell me that I'm not preparing for labor correctly, then proceeded to yell at my stomach "hurry up and come so grandma can take care of you right! I'll be here everyday!" This will be here 7th grandchild but her first from her only son, by husband. I can only imagine how she will be after baby girl arrives. Husband and I have already talked about it, we will sit her down and let her know that there are barriers.

Answer

It's not being a brat to need your space to heal, sleep, bond, feed baby, etc. 
I would ask my husband to put guidelines down, whatever y'all decide on. Would he be on your side and be willing to stand up to his mom? 
Do es MIL have to text or call before popping over? If so, I'd make whoever she texts/calls say "Now is not a good time." 
If she is this bad now... it's only gonna get worse as the baby gets older. Practice boundaries now ❤️ Hugs and good luck.

Answer

At least she's bringing food and helping out. My mil comes over without asking, and will just walk in like it's her house. And doesn't help with anything, she comes over every other day and my baby is a month old

Answer

So glad my son's grandma on his dads side lives 4 hours away.

Answer

I would be def be annoyed with every two days and probably even once a week. But I am a brat 😂

Answer

right there with you. my mil is overwhelming. for someone who just didn't feel like a grandma, she sure is overstepping all boundaries.