Conflicting feelings

Me and my husband have been trying to conceive since the beginning of this year now - I understand this isn't a long time but we were both hoping a little miracle would happen quickly. I previously suffered a miscarriage a number of years ago and it took me a very long time to get past and move on from the bad feelings and blaming myself. I've only really spoke about this with my best friend and confided that we were trying again. Today she's told me the great news that her and her SO are expecting - 1 month after stopping contraception. I know I should be so happy for her and part of me is, but am I an awful person to be thinking why so easy for her and not me? I want to be supportive and happy for her but at the same time I am so conflicted about watching her pregnancy for the next 9 months.