We have been trying tor 6 months now. I have always been positive in that it will happen when it's meant to be. My SO would get upset at times and I'd just say it will be when it's meant to be. But the last month I feel like its never going to happen. I spent most of today crying my eyes out and just asking god why? Why not me? Why everyone else? My SO reminded me god has a plan and when it's right we will have a baby. I just can't get myself to stay positive. After obsessive tracking the first few months I could see that was not going to work for me so I've just tried to have fun with it. I feel like I'm a jealous mean person now and I hate it. Everyone I went to high school with is pregnant. I want to be happy for them but I just can't. I just want it to be my turn now.