therapy?? Maybe?

okay this is really hard to talk about but I really need some help or advice. I've never talked about this with anyone before. I tried with my mother before and just couldn't stop crying to talk...well here it is when I was between 5 and 7 I lost my virginity or I guess you could say I was rape by my sister and it didn't stop until I was 10 I went thought so much stress because of it that I had my period early and had to be put on depression pills before the age of 9.. things are still very painful and hard. now that I'm 23 years old me and her do not have relationship of any kind. When I try to talk about it she charges the topic. I feel like I need a way to heal from it before I can move on. I stay away from her as much as I can but I Know it hurts my family when I do. I know I'm a mess right??