Why am I still insecure?

Question

My boyfriend and I were getting ready to go to sleep. We were already laying down and I said I was hot and so I was going to take my clothes off well I turned to where my back was towards him and took my clothes off and hurried up and got in bed. He asked if I was still insecure about my body and I said yes. He looked at me puzzled and asked why and proceeded to tell me that I was absolutely beautiful and that I shouldn't be insecure. So why is it that I still am?

This is my amazing boyfriend

This is me you can't really see it but I've got a chunky belly.

This is my amazing boyfriend

This is me you can't really see it but I've got a chunky belly.

Answer

it'll take time for you not to be insecure. I'm insecure about my body too and I get told I'm skinny then I get asked by family if I'm pregnant when I'm not. It's very hurtful but my family has body shamed me my whole life. My bf has been building me up for almost 2 years and I still think negative about my body so it's going to take more time for me to not feel bad about how I look

Answer

Beliefs are very hard to shake, and most of them are deeply rooted in the subconscious. There is a short part of a book that explains this: google Toltec secret to happiness PDF, and read the intro :) anyway, some of us have it so heavily weighing on us that we are not worthy of love... or we feel separate from the world, when in actuality we are all connected.

Answer

Most men don't see women's bodies like we see our bodies. I'd say majority of guys see us as soft, someone they'd like to snuggle with, and guess what, they look past our flaws to seeing only a beautiful person in their eyes. Men are visual creatures that see the whole of you, not just the parts that make you feel flawed. That's what my husband has told me before and I love him for it. I hope you'll believe your man too when he calls you beautiful because he sees you as beautiful, flaws and all!!

Answer

we live in a world that majes women believe if they weigh more than 120-130 that they are huge and nasty and not attractive. youre really pretty. if he tells you not to be insecure... he means it.  maybe find something that will boost your self esteem. being confident in yourself will be sexy to him.

Answer

It can take a while. I was super insecure as I had gone through extreme weight loss prior to meeting my BF (now husband). My body was a huge squishy deflated floppy mess. It was hard to fathom how anyone could find me appealing. I felt more confident at 400+ pounds then I did at 200. I couldn't full out hide everything since we eventually lived together so he obviously KNeW what I all looked like but I still tried to be naked as little as possible around him (or for short as duration as possible) and even during sex I would 98% of the time leave a shirt on.  
Then one day we were out of town at a hotel and we got upgraded to a jacuzzi tub room. He LOvES baths, I hate them (I just find them gross in general) but he really wanted me to join him. I mustered up enough courage to say yes - stripped down buck ass naked right there and in complete and utter full view of him climb my saggy, melty, flabby body into the tub; loose skin floating to the surface and all. And he still loved me fully exposed. It was really a turning point for me and i feel it was the day we really and truly connected - because finally I allowed him fully in.   After that I was MUCH more secure about myself and finally could trust in the fact he really did love me for me.  I did eventually get a tummy tuck to remove the 15lbs of hanging skin and that of course was a huge boost in confidence as well. But it was that moment of allowing myself to be completely exposed with him in a bath that was the major turning point.