gender denial?

Amnesty • Mommy to Aurora born at 31w2d, Declan born at 37w0d and Connor and Liam due 1/31/2018.

So at 17 weeks I went in for a growth ultrasound and was told both twins are boys. I hadnt been wrong about gender with my 2 past pregnancies and am having a hard time convincing myself that its true. I truely felt that it would be one of each. I feel bad about not being able to accept this but with the way the twins are laying, part of me thinks they may have checked the same baby twice. We go in 2 weeks for a complete anatomy scan so that will be confirmation but am I a bad mom for having such a hard time with this?