hubby: why you by all my shirts so small

me: I bought them the correct size, you just haven't been pushing the plate back lately

hubby: Well... why this one got stains on it, I worked hard to be able to finally fit and it got oil all on it.

Me: So, you worked hard to gain all those pounds to wear one shirt.

Hubby: (With pride in his voice) Yes! And now it has oil stains, oh well I'm trucker so it'll be fine.

This man keeps me laughing each day even when I want to be mad at him.