Every month I convince myself we’ve done it. Literally convinced, then the bitch shows her face.

With our son, he happened straight away. We wanted him to have a sibling close in age. His sibling took 3 months to conceive, making it a 2.5 year age gap. We were so so happy. 4 months in, i had to have a termination for medical reasons and I am broken. I wanted to try again ASAP but took the advice of the drs and started again when they suggested a few months later. Been trying again for 3 months now and af has arrived again. I know some will say 3 months is nothing and I know. But when we wanted that age gap and we had it!! And now it looks like it’s just going to be a huge age gap and I feel bad about it. I want so badly to give my little boy a sibling and my partner and myself another child.

Why the fuck is this so hard and painful

Sorry. Just needed to let this out.