Dear Mom...

You tell me to talk to you about my problems instead of going to someone else like my boyfriend or a teacher. But when I talk to you about it you make no effort to fix it or help me. Like when I told you how I’m uncomfortable with your “boyfriend” being here, especially when I need to do things like shower or sleep in the night. Or how I told you I hate the way you two constantly fight and how he calls you horrible names.

Yet you still let him sleep over, knowing I’m not comfortable with it. You still allow him to be in this house eating your food, watching your tv, using your cable, and laying in your bed as he continues to stress you out and harass you. I understand that he is the father of my two younger sisters but that is no excuse to put up with his bullshit. So when I decided to do something about it, like go to a teacher, you got upset with me. You made me feel guilty for doing something I’ve been told by teachers and counselors is a good thing.

Now I’m having contradicting thoughts. I’m glad I spoke up about it and told someone. But I’m also mad at myself and wish I never said anything because I see how badly you’re reacting to the choice I made. Now I have this feeling in my stomach that’s been hurting me non stop because I’m not sure if you’re disappointed in me or not. Now I feel as if I can’t speak about my problems because they’re not being fixed by you and when I go to someone else I feel like the bad guy.

I’m tired of living this way so when I move out after graduating this June don’t be too surprised.