I understand where he's coming from

Ok so the bf an i are all good again anyways.... Ok so Wednesday my bf came home after work an said we needed to talk... ooookkkk.... so we start talking... don't judge us pls.. I've been separated from my husband off august made 1 year i've been busy building my home an taken care of my children, about 7 months ago I meet the man of dreams we've taken everything slow which is very different for me I usually rush into things... Ok so we've talked a couple times about me getting a divorce its just not in the cards at the moment all though in do have them all ready with a lawyer I just have to pay for him an court an etc. But he came home said he couldn't do it anymore it bothers him too much to know that he can't fully call me his , I understood where he was coming from It would be hard for me too but we talked about it got it all worked out then the fact that I'm fixed came up I told him once again that's not permanent women can get pregnant with their tubes tied an we can have a reversal I'm only 27 we have time still.. but he was all broken up an confused I told him its fine whatever I come back from taken a shower I told him we can't do anything about my divorce or about my tubes right now but I have 2 boys that he loves an that love him because their father has ran off with his gf doing whatever... he came in the room after I said my peace an went to lay down he came in grabbed me up said I don't want u to go anywhere I've never had a real woman to love me like u do I've done wrong In my past an baby I'm scared I'll fuck up this happiness that karma will pull one on me, I love u an I want u to be my wife but I can't but it's just me over thinking pls don't ever leave me .... I turned to him told you don't give up that fast when u hit a bump in the road u keep going I won't leave u ur the best man nice ever met an it'll take more than that to make me leave .... the past couple days have been amazing I tell he really need to get that off his chest an Friday I took 50 dollars an put it up for my lawyer an court fees to show him it'll happen., it just makes me feel amazing to know he wants me to be his wife one day that he wants that option to plan out the question an our wedding he's never proposed to any girl he's dated so it really shows how he feels 😍😍😍