Maybe I'm everything he says I am: lazy, bitchy, messed up in the head, lack of motivation, and using him. Maybe I deserved to be left alone. Maybe he really does need to be away from me because I am not helping his recovery. Maybe I shouldn't call him anymore or answer his calls when he calls me. Maybe I should tell him it's over and to live with his friend. He said it's my choice and I have to make it. I have to fix it, he can't and won't help. He hasn't been himself since he came back from deployment. He was even forced into counseling while overseas due to his behavior. I'm not the kind of woman to handle this. I tried, I stayed with him through it all, I gave up my happiness for him many times. I tried to hide my negative emotions to make sure he didn't get stressed. It wasn't enough. I still ruined everything. Maybe I should stop ruining his life and just forget we were ever together. He deserves better than a loser like me.