I just need to vent!!!

So I've had two miscarriages in the past. Both different "would've been" fathers and not boyfriends... I got excited that I was pregnant both times because having a child is a blessing in my eyes regardless of how it happened. I've been sleeping with this guy off and on for about 4 months now and on Sunday the condom broke. Usually my cycles are 28-31 days so my fertile days would've started this coming Friday. I showed him this app to tell him we were most likely fine because I had just ended my period on the Friday previous to the condom breaking. Well my period was only 23 days this cycle so I googled when I would ovulate with a 23 day cycle and two websites showed this(picture attached at bottom) so I told him and he freaked out telling me to take plan b for 2 days. I finally said yes today with only 10 hours left in the 72 to even take it.. so we go to buy it, i take it & an hour later I make myself throw up because I regretted the decision I made. I'm not saying i want to be pregnant but there's obviously that little bit of wanting to be when you know there's a possibility right?. Especially considering I've already lost two. He wanted To go back to get another pill and I told him I had changed my mind about taking it and wanted to let life take control,, it's my body right?.... am I a bad person for wanting this ? Pls just be honest with your opinions???