Just fed up

Im teary :( I think all these faint positives have really confused me and I wish I hadn't caved and tested so early.. It's a joke how this has made me feel and one minute I get my hopes up then the next they just plummet back down. I'm miserable now and really weepy. I feel sleepy and completely alone.. I can only prey this is my month as I can't ttc anymore after this cycle , because of me and my partner not being together anymore.. It's just a big thing to deal with and I just need the next few days to go quicker so I can test again.. Fingers crossed ay :(