Going Crazy

It has been a crazy month. I ovulated last week and my peak day was supposed to be Friday. My husband got appendicitis and had to have emergency surgery on Friday evening so I am crossing my fingers that some swimmers got up there prior to us not being able to finish out the ovulation week as planned. In a way I feel like all of these things keep happening as a way to tell us that we shouldn’t have a baby right now. Does anyone else ever feel this way? I had my IUD taken out and this is our fourth cycle trying and I was super positive when I first had it taken out that conceiving was going to be so easy for us and every month it’s something new. I just need some reassurance that I’m not crazy or am thinking things are signs that are out of my control when they are just that, things out of my control. I feel like I have been putting a lot of pressure on myself because I wanted so badly to time our pregnancy so we had an early summer baby and I feel like this is a test of my patience and my OCD to have a plan for everything so wrenches are purposefully being thrown at me to see how I handle them. I’m sorry if it seems like I am being selfish or just plain crazy but I needed to vent and for someone to make me feel like I’m not the only one experiencing this. 😢